10 Years Cancer-Free!

I’ve made it past the 10 year mark! :)

If you’re reading this and you or a loved one is early on in their cancer journey, have faith. You can beat this.

Much love to you,

Julie

Putting first things first - it's never too late!

Too often, we wait until a major life event occurs before realizing we've had our priorities all wrong.  Maybe it's a financial meltdown that forces you to decide what expenditures are too important versus which you can live without.  Perhaps it's the end of a significant relationship for which you put aside your own hopes and dreams and suddenly you have a clean slate to decide where you'll live or how you'll spend your time.  Or, like me, it may take a near-fatal disease as the ultimate reminder that time is the most precious commodity, and it's not without limits.

I hope it doesn't take any of these kinds of events to prompt you to reflect on where your time, energy and money goes and to decide if you're putting first things first. If it has (or does), don't panic - it's never too late to change course, if change is what you're after. Just realize change requires a decision and follow through. After all, bridges don't just appear over rivers; they're built using a blueprint (remember those!?) with input from experts, and the sweat and commitment of laborers before that ribbon cutting ceremony can happen.

Who, and what, is most important to you? What do you want to be remembered for? 
Do your choices reflect it? If not, what's in your way? 

I'm considering all of these questions and more. I know that taking an inventory of where my precious resources go and comparing that to what I believe my values and priorities are will be a sobering exercise. Until I do that, I won't be in a position to identify and cease opportunities to take steps to truly putting first things first. I've waited long enough.

When I thought it wouldn't happen to me

On this date, four years ago, I spent my last day not knowing I would have cancer. I praise God every day for another day. Knowing not everyone has the blessing of another day with their loved ones, I try to not take it for granted.  

I look back on photographs of myself "pre-BC" (before breast cancer) and I almost always think about how I had it and didn't know it or how nice it was thinking it wouldn't happen to me and how I lived care free in terms of what I ate and did, not knowing I could have been upping my chances of it actually happening to me.  

I know better now. 

I praise God for pointing out the cancer before it was too late, and for the new knowledge that has helped me become healthy and make better choices for me and my family.

May 26, 2009 was the last day I spent thinking it wouldn't happen to me. I pray you'll never have to say something like that.

Blessings,
Julie


Ecclesiastes 1:18

Farewell For Now - In Memory of Taira Johnson Baughman

My sweet friend, Taira Baughman, has gone home to the Lord this morning.  She fought triple negative breast cancer long and hard (since 2010), and is survived by her amazing husband, Rob, and their beautiful children: Jaclyn (19), Breanna (16), Joshua (13), 

and Braydon (5). 

In February, Taira was gifted a surprise trip to Los Angeles to fulfill her dream of going to the Ellen show. It was an honor to be a part of it.  During her visit we did many fun things together, including a photo shoot at Venice Beach, thanks to Brooke Ritter for volunteering her time and talent.  Here's a video Taira created to share her fun trip memories. Our friend, Patti, made this trip possible and invited me to participate. 

Memories I'll cherish forever.

I miss you already, friend. xoxo May you rest in peace in the loving arms of our savior, Jesus. 

You can help the Baughman family with your prayers to help them through this difficult loss, and by contributing to pay off the mountain of medical bills that remain. You can donate online, or at any Suntrust in person or by mail:  

Taira Baughman’s Benefit Account

Sun Trust Bank

15375 Lebanon Road

Old Hickory, TN. 37138

Please visit Taira's blog for other ways you may help the Baughman family.

Thank you for your prayers and support of the Baughmans. Please pass this along to others who may be able to help the Baughman family. 

Praying for Taira

My sweet, dear friend, Taira has been battling stage 4 triple negative breast cancer and was recently sent home on hospice care. You can read about her journey, in her own words, on her blog.

Would you please keep Taira and her family in your thoughts and prayers? This is a very difficult time for them and all who love them and they could use all the prayers we can muster.   Thank you so much.  Below are some photos during Taira's recent visit with me and our friend Patti here in  southern California in February - it was a truly blessed time together that I will forever cherish, and I'm so grateful to our friend Brooke (Brooke Ritter Photography) for volunteering her time and talent to capture our special time together.

Taira, I love you!




Taira
Venice Beach, CA - 2/6/13

 

Taira - Patti - Julie
with our Ellen show shirts



Taira - Julie - Patti
Pink bikes on the beach!





Sisterly love
Julie - Taira - Patti



Jumping for joy with my sisters

"How can I help her?"

Since becoming a cancer survivor, one of my favorite questions to receive is "How can I help her?" When I get this question I know that there is pure love at work. Someone is taking the time to ask a survivor what helped (or would have helped) them get through it. Everyone is different in the way they approach their treatment, how much they want to talk about it, or how much help they want and need.  But my experience, and interaction with numerous other survivors, brings the following suggestions to mind.

As you consider these suggestions, think about how close you are to her and what feels comfortable and natural based on your relationship, time, and resources available.

• Stay in touch. Call, write, visit. Cancer isn't contagious but it is isolating. Don't be afraid of "bothering" your loved one. She needs all the support she can get. She may or may not want to talk about it. Play it by ear and take her lead but don't disappear. Sadly, many do. Don't be one of them.

• Organize a meal train where local friends can sign up to bring meals on certain days. Talk to her about how it works, get her and the family's preferences, sensitivities, and include that information on the website you use. Mealtrain.com is a great resource for organizing meals.  Another great resource is lotsahelpinghands.com which allows people to organize different types of support needs.

• Sign her up for "Cleaning For A Reason" - a free cleaning service for women in breast cancer treatment - provided by local cleaning services who join this awesome program to make a difference in the community. If there aren't any participating providers in her area, call local cleaning services to ask if they'll do it, or commit to showing up and cleaning her house for her if you're a close friend or relative that she's comfortable with.

• Offer to take her kids out for activities with your own kids, or offer to babysit so she can rest without interruptions.

• Offer to drive her to the doctor, and/or to visit and play cards or talk during chemo. Chemo appointments are long and it's nice to have a distraction which could be quality time with a friend. Bring a packed lunch, a deck of cards, etc.

• Take her hat/scarf shopping, or pick up cute hats and scarves to bring her to try on at home. Look up free scarves, hats, headgear for cancer patients online. There's lots of great companies and organizations that offer freebies like that. If she wants a wig, the American Cancer Society offers free wigs to cancer patients and they even carry human hair wigs. I wish I had known about this before I spent money on a wig.

• Put her on the prayer list at church. Pray for her complete healing and recovery, for her and her family's peace and comfort during this difficult time. 

• Call her before you go grocery shopping for your own family, and offer to pick things up for her while you're there.

• Sign her up for free and beautiful handmade cards sent by another survivor...www.littlelifepreservers.com. These cards are comforting and beautiful. I enjoyed receiving them and I've signed up friends who have enjoyed receiving them.

• Be patient with her. This is a time of great stress, and the treatment is intense and exhausting. The medications impact her physically and emotionally. Her energy will ebb and flow but won't be predictable. Be flexible. She may feel great one day and awful the next. Be forgiving. It's an emotional roller coaster.  During chemo, I received steroids the first few days of every cycle and I was not a nice person on those days but I couldn't help it - the medicine altered my thinking and my moods. I felt awful that I was mean to those who loved me.  Remember, this is temporary.

• Organize a fundraiser to help her cover unpaid expenses, or to raise money for local, regional, or national cancer research foundations in her honor. Ask her if she has a favorite charity or a special financial need that you can focus the effort on.

Thank you for caring enough about her to ask how you can help, and for following through to support her during her cancer journey. She's lucky to have you on her support team.

Love and blessings,

Julie

COMING SOON - what NOT to do or say when a loved one has cancer. 

Galatians 6:2 "Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ."

Let Them Help & Just Do

When I was caring for David, I felt so helpless. I couldn't take his pain away. I couldn't take his worries away. I certainly couldn't take his cancer away.  I wanted to help him any way I could. I'd offer lots of times. How about I clean the house? Does your daughter need a ride somewhere? What about groceries, can I shop for you? Every time, the answer was a gracefully delivered "no, thanks, honey, just you being here is helpful to me."  While I was happy my presence was comforting to him, I was crushed I couldn't do more.  On days when David couldn't get out of bed, or when I couldn't stand it to not be doing something, I just did stuff for him without asking....cleaning, errands, etc. I know he appreciated it but even more so it helped me feel helpful.

Fast forward 11 years and I became the patient.  Surrounded by caring and loving family and friends all wanting to help me. Numerous offers of help and I suddenly realized how David felt. So grateful for their support, but paralyzed by the thought of losing my independence and of becoming a burden or an item on others' to-do lists.

I turned lots of offers of help down, despite knowing how it feels to be in their shoes, AND despite being in need of the help being offered. But about halfway through treatment, something happened that opened my eyes to the dangers of turning help down in times like this. Not only did I need the help, but THEY NEEDED TO HELP and I was taking away the one thing they felt they could do to contribute to my well being.

This journey is NOT only about the patient. It's also about everyone who loves them. Life is about love, relationships, togetherness. Don't let cancer change that. As a patient, understand that loved ones don't just *want* to help, they NEED to. Let them.  Caregivers, understand that it's difficult for your independent loved one to accept help - they don't want to be a burden. Just help and do what you can. Don't just offer, DO. Because although they may turn down offers, they will appreciate everything you follow through and do - especially if and when you aren't requiring them to decide what you can/will do for them.

Love each other through it. That's what life is about, in good times and bad.

"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." (1 Corinthians 13:13 NIV)

Love and blessings,
Julie

The Gift of Quiet

When I was in chemo, my most common challenges were fatigue and heightened sensitivity to noise. My son was a year old and my spouse was away frequently as a normal part of his job and there were many many days that I didn't know how I would possibly keep my eyes open and fulfill all my basic responsibilities as a mom - even with a sitter during the weekdays, the evenings and weekends were quite a challenge.

It was hugely helpful when friends and neighbors stopped by to take my son for a walk or a few hours of play time at their house so I could rest in silence.

If you can give the gift of quiet time to a friend or family member in cancer treatment, it will be so appreciated and never forgotten. Don't just offer...show up with a plan and follow through. Thank you to all my amazing friends who gave me the gift of quiet rest time! Xoxo

Love and blessings,
Julie

Luke 6:38

Caregivers Need Support Too

Just before I was diagnosed with cancer in 2009, I observed the 11-year anniversary of the cancer death of a dear friend and 'significant other' (the word 'boyfriend' never really fit since we were adults).  David was a vibrant, athletic, brilliant, outgoing, and passionate 44 year old who inspired just about everyone he met.  He inspired me so much when we were first colleagues and later became friends, because he was living life so fully all of the time.  By the time he was 40 he had already changed careers several times to follow his dreams of trying different paths.  He was a sheriff's deputy, an attorney, an investment broker, just to name a few.  David dabbled in speed (ice) skating, running, basketball, even gardening!  His personality was magnetic. He remembered names and events and everyone that he interacted with felt like they were the only person in sight because he made everyone feel special. Even while in his third year of perpetual chemotherapy treatment for stage 4 cancer, David was busy making everyone else feel good. 

During a brief visit with him the winter of 1997, I was so moved by David's spirit and love for life that I left my life in Boston and moved across the country to be near him in his final months of life.  I had no idea what I was getting myself into as I took on the role as a member of his caregiver team but I didn't care.  Back then, the internet was pretty new and there wasn't a tremendous amount of information available the way there is today.  Once in California,  I found an online support message board for cancer caregivers. A God-send since I quickly learned that the role of caregiver is as stressful and frightening as the role of patient.

Caregivers (family members, friends, neighbors) take on their role suddenly, unexpectedly, involuntarily, and with no training. In today's typical outpatient cancer treatment delivery model, the caregiver is the traffic cop for patients, navigating doctors' visits and treatment plans as an advocate and often home "nurse", serving as the patient's gatekeeper managing social visitors and helpers, performing and delegating household chores, interpreting and confronting insurance processes and decisions, and much more.  All the while, they're faced with their own worries, fears, and frustrations, feeling helpless and unequipped for their new job in addition to juggling their own personal and professional obligations.  Even secondary caregivers - helpers, friends, and family members on the periphery - struggle with how to talk to or help their loved one after a cancer diagnosis. It's a tremendous stressor and often caregivers' needs are overlooked.

Caregivers suffer profoundly - emotionally and physically.  If you are a caregiver, your fears, pain, worry and frustration are real and valid. You need to be cared for too, even if you don't think so.  Not even the patient can understand how a caregiver suffers, unless they've been in that role themselves.

Since I've been both the caregiver and the patient I'll be posting about some topics from both perspectives over the next few months. I hope to provide helpful information to demonstrate to caregivers and patients alike that both roles are stressful and difficult but there are lots of resources for both. Meantime, if you're a patient please remember that your caregivers are hurting too and sometimes they need an extra hug and a thank-you, just like you need some extra grace and love during this stressful time.

I welcome your input, suggestions and questions along the way. Do you have specific questions you'd like me to answer? Would you like to share your story as a caregiver or a patient as a guest on my blog? Email me at organicfaith@ca.rr.com.

An Attitude of Gratitude

Ever since I began my cancer journey, I took on an attitude of gratitude like never before. I've always known how fortunate I have been through out my life, in spite of my own personal trials (of which there have been PLENTY), but it never hit me so fully as when I realized just how precious of a gift every day is. I thank God and my savior, Jesus Christ, every day for the countless blessings I have received and continue to receive.

Like anyone, I certainly have my moments when gratitude isn't emanating from me (who doesn't!?), but the Lord sends amazing messages to remind me of who I am, where I've been, how far I've come, and where I will always be so long as I hold fast to Him. 

This month, I've joined many friends who pause each day to reflect on something that I'm thankful for, and posted it to my Facebook page.  At the end of the month, I'll post all of my thankful posts here to the blog.  Some days I'm thankful for very simple things, whereas others my thoughts and thanks are directed to heftier things/topics. It's a great exercise that is helping me get my attitude of gratitude on each day.  What I know for certain is that I have so much to be thankful for - salvation through Christ, health, family, employment, friends, and soooo much more.

What are you thankful for today?  I'd love to hear from you.    

Love and blessings,
Julie

^{Colossians 3:15-17}
Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts.And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. 

When was the last time...

...you felt your bumps for lumps? If it has been more than a month, please take 5 minutes now to do it. Not sure how to do it? Don't worry, many women don't know how...but it's critical you learn or refresh your memory of the proper procedure. 

Here are some links to instructions that are easy to follow. Please, do it now. And, don't forget to check under your arms.

The Five Steps of a Breast Self Exam by BreastCancer.org

Breast Self Exam info by the American Cancer Society

National Breast Cancer Foundation, Inc.'s 3 Simple Steps

May your days and nights be filled with God's blessings, mercy, and love. May you see your trials as blessings in disguise, as part of His greater plan for your amazing life. May His purpose be revealed to you and your courage and obedience be plentiful. His plans are always better than our own...especially when we listen and follow.

Love and hugs,

Julie

Sisterhood

A bond like no other. I'm so grateful for my sister warriors and their friendship. Tonight we got together in the old lunch spot we often went to after our support group meetings. Can you believe this - just 2.5 years separate these photos. Thank you, Lord, for keeping us safe. These women mean so much to me. Sisters forever. I love you, Jess and Tira!

"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer." Romans 12:12 (NIV)

Zofran warning!

This week there was breaking news about a new risk found with Zofran, the anti-nausea med often prescribed to pregnant moms, children, and chemo patients.  


http://www.medpagetoday.com/HematologyOncology/Chemotherapy/33556


Praying that none of us experiences any dangerous effects from taking it.


Love and blessings,
Julie

Dear Lisa Who Won't Be Ignored

I hope and pray you got my text so you'll see this message.  We met just over an hour ago in the parking lot. We both know it was no accident. When you got dressed this morning and chose your shirt, you probably didn't know it was all part of the grand plan to bring us together today :)


I know it can be hard to believe, particularly at a time like this, but what I told you today was a message meant for you at that exact moment and that exact place.   And what you told me, about never having been a certain place ever before, was a message meant for me at that exact moment and that exact place. I believe that with all my heart.


This is a turning point for you.  I'll be praying for you - that God will infuse you with His wisdom, His healing light and love, and show you the path He wants you to walk.


Please keep in touch, my new friend. And, if you lose my contact info and need or want to reach me, you can always call over to the NorthPark Community Church and ask them for my number.  


Hugs and blessings to you! xoxo 
Julie

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11


So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10

3 Years!

years

TRIUMPH

5/28/09 - dx'd

6/12/09 - bilateral mastectomy

7/14/09 - chemo began

12/15/09 - 12th and final chemo infusion

2/1/10 - first clean scan with no evidence of disease

2/4/10 - 3/19/10 - 33 radiation treatments

5/18/10 - oophorectomy/hysterectomy

stopped counting surgeries after #7 for 

reconstruction and lumpectomies (benign)

numerous MRIs, PETs, CTs

quarterly bloodwork and infusions 

lymphedema

BORN AGAIN 1/24/10

AMAZING SUPPORT NETWORK OF 

FAMILY, FRIENDS, CAREGIVERS

BLESSED BEYOND MEASURE

PRAISE THE LORD!

Dear warrior sisters,

Don't give up. Trust in the Lord. He has a magnificent purpose for your life. Ask Him, and listen for His answers. Be an instrument for Him and all else will fall into its rightful place. 

With love, and gratitude for every breath I take, 

Julie 

"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9

Turning points - we've all got 'em

We all have them. Moments in time where something changes. Maybe everything changes. Or, maybe it just seems like it has or will.  We probably have thousands of them throughout our lives. I wonder how many I've had but didn't recognize.  I know I've had some monumental ones that I not only recognize but will never forget. Not ever. Marrying the love of my life, welcoming Cooper into our family, being diagnosed with breast cancer, and becoming born again in Christ - just to name a few.


Last month I was invited to take part in a project called Turning Point. It's a photo shoot and collection of stories of breast cancer survivors. The project is headed up by a talented local photographer, Tibor Deme, and Terry Bucknall, director of the Sheila R. Veloz Breast Imaging Center in Valencia, CA (where my breast cancer was found and confirmed). 


Tibor describes this project on his site by stating: "I will relentlessly pursue the desired effects that the pictures will convey their strengths, will, anger, pain, sadness, triumph, etc. I want the cannons from their battle heard and the celebratory fireworks shared and seen by many near and far. Let the individual stories and portraits contained within be their pillars of strength and motivation so they have the will to fight on! I want our warriors to know that with mind over matter, and a “never give up” attitude, they, too, can be victorious over cancer!"


The images will be displayed in a photography show and proceeds will fund breast cancer treatment for women who do not have health insurance.  They will also be included in a published book.


Thank you, Tibor and Terry, for including me in this project. I'm honored that I could be a part of it. I love all the images. They show the raw, natural me. In pre-cancer days I might have been disappointed to see my wrinkles and war-tattered skin and hair in print but today I know that the aggressive treatment that I had to endure aged me and and while I'd love to look younger and thinner like anyone else would love to too, I also love me as I am - the real deal - God-made and God-saved.  


The following images from the photo shoot are my favorites. If you are a breast cancer survivor in the Los Angeles area and would like to participate in this powerful project, please contact Tibor and Terry at turningpoint@tibordeme.com. 

May God bless you and all of your turning points, today and every day.

Love,

Julie

Be vigilant! Know your body. Check yourself.

I have less than one percent breast tissue remaining since my bilateral mastectomy when my breast cancer journey began. However, that tiny percent of tissue is still at risk so I do monthly breast self exams every month. Truth be told, I do it a lot more frequently than that because the type of breast cancer I had (triple negative breast cancer), is very aggressive (grade 3) and grows incredibly fast.  


Whether you've had breast cancer or not, if you value your life on earth in any way, I hope and pray you're being vigilant and getting to know your body well enough to know when you feel something that is new or suddenly different when conducting a self exam.


As a survivor, I don't take chances with anything unusual that I feel. Thankfully, all of the unusual lumps I've found thus far in my post-treatment phase have turned out benign but we've removed a few to have them tested to be sure. It happened in October and I had a lumpectomy. I found another lump shortly after Christmas and have had a ultrasound and a MRI to take a closer look and it appears to be the same type of benign mass that they removed in October but since the only way to be certain is to remove it, it will be taken out when I have a revision reconstructive surgery mid-March. The doctor is not concerned about waiting until then since that's just 6 weeks away and the MRI results indicate a benign finding - praise the Lord!


Each time I feel something like that I go through a battery of visits and tests to figure out what it is and while that is annoyingly inconvenient and expensive, it is a necessity to ensure I continue to dance with NED (no evidence of disease). It's a small price to pay for longevity and I'm willing to pay it. 


Friends, please be vigilant with your health. Don't ignore signs of trouble. Don't delay, forget about or willingly choose not to perform critical self exams.  You are loved and you have a purpose here on earth so please don't contribute to cutting your own time on earth short.  If you haven't done a self exam in a while - do it now. Please.  


Here are some links that provide instructions on performing a thorough breast self exam --

American Cancer Society - Breast Self Exam

BreastCancer.org's 5 Steps to a Breast Self Exam

May God light your path wherever you go, bringing you peace, joy and love. May He heal your body, heart and mind of all that ails you, restoring you to who you are meant to be. Be kind to yourself.


Love,
Julie

Double whammy - strep & sinus infection!

It's been too long since my last post and I'm sorry I've been silent here. I have a post in draft but haven't been able to take the time to finish it.  Thank you for the sweet reach-outs checking in on me - your care and concern mean so much to me.  So here's a quick update.

It's been a very busy autumn;  I've had lots of work projects, plus a fun new pink wig warrior project, for which I've been putting in lots of extra hours. I love the challenge and stimulation of these projects but I have not done a great job getting the rest and exercise I need to keep my immune system strong.

Cooper has been sick a couple of times and each time he's passed it on to me so I've been sick a couple of times all in the last few months.  This current bout has been brutal.  I've been in agonizing pain since Thursday night with a screaming sore throat, pounding head, aches and pains from head to foot, and a fever that just wouldn't quit.  Friday morning at urgent care the doc said it was a virus but didn't test me for strep.  Told me to go home and rest and keep up with the over the counter fever reducing pain meds.

I've been alternating ibuprofen and acetaminophen around the clock, neither even touching the pain, so last night I broke out the "big guns" and dipped into the left over Percocet from my big surgery over the summer and THAT didn't even help!  I've been in bed since Thursday night, only getting up to use the bathroom, grab some tea or a snack, or say good night to Cooper, or head to urgent care.

This morning I went back to urgent care since I wasn't getting better and couldn't find relief from the throat pain.  The doc took a look at my throat and ears and said I have strep AND a sinus infection - didn't even need to test me.  He called in a high dose antibiotic and a cough syrup with codeine.  I hope these work quickly to get me feeling better because Bob has to go back to work soon and then I'll be juggling Cooper, the animals, and work all on my own again.   He's been so wonderful - taking care of me and Cooper all week and weekend. I'm so blessed and lucky to have such a caring husband. Thank you, Bobby! xoxo

I sure hope and pray that I am feeling a lot better tomorrow and throughout the rest of the week. There's much left to do to finish up work commitments and prepare for Christmas next weekend.  Our new treadmill (which Bob and I gave each other for Christmas) will arrive later this week and when it does I'll be incorporating daily exercise into my routine to get me back on track with diet and exercise efforts. Exercise is so important for reducing one's risk of recurrence and also for the immune system overall.  Besides, my clothes don't fit! LOL I need to lose about 12 lbs before my next reconstructive surgery mid-March. More about that later.

Dear Lord, my healer, my redeemer, please heal my body quickly and effectively so that I may resume plans to celebrate and serve You.  Please allow the medicine to quickly eliminate the infections and bring relief from the pain so that I may tend to my boy and my work with energy and joy.  Thank you, Lord, for sending me such a caring and attentive husband and for giving him the patience and will to take such wonderful care of me and our son while I have been ill. I'm so grateful for your mercy and love. In Jesus' name, Amen.

Frequent surgery "flyer" miles, please!

All week long I was sure I was having surgery today. Last Friday it began at my check-up with the surgeon who performed my my bi-lateral mastectomy in 2009 - because last week I felt something suspicious in my left breast (details in previous post).  When she said she wanted to take it out she said "how's next Friday for you?" so then Friday was on the brain.  Her assistant later handed me a sheet of paper that had Thursday's date. I didn't notice that date corresponded with Thursday (not Friday).  I got a call Wednesday morning from the UCLA surgery center to confirm my surgery for the following morning. "What?!" LOL  I fumbled through my paperwork and there it was. Oops.

I checked in with the surgery center earlier than my call time because lately L.A. traffic has been worse than usual and I nearly missed my biopsy appointment on Monday due to awful traffic (a 30 mile drive took me 2 hours!).  They took me in right away though and my surgeon was ready to go so I got to get in quickly, not before asking the check-in clerk to credit me with some "frequent flyer" points. OK OK so they don't award those but she smiled and replied "sorry, we're fresh out of those today."

In pre-op, I did the usual and tried my best to make everyone laugh and smile. I firmly believe that surgery goes smoothly and we're set up to be surrounded by the best possible energy when we connect with our care providers in a positive way. I have had umpteen surgeries in the past two+ years on this journey and my blog followers know it's paid off for me so I'm sticking with that philosophy. :)

It was a quick surgery, one hour, followed by an hour of recovery. I had general anesthesia for this lumpectomy.  By the way, I never imagined I'd have a lumpectomy once I had a bilateral mastectomy over 2 years ago.  However, it's an important reminder to all that even mastectomy surgery can not remove ALL breast tissue and about 1% is left behind. And, if you have reconstruction involving transplanted tissue (fat) like I had in June, that tissue also needs to be examined for abnormalities as well.

When I woke up, my surgeon informed me she is 99.9% sure that the benign biopsy results will be confirmed by pathology now that she's seen and removed the lumps. She said she's sure it was fat necrosis (dead fat) which makes sense given the timing and nature of my last surgery.

I was actually able to walk out of the hospital (first time I've done that after all the many surgeries I've had) on my own without a wheelchair assist and Bob drove me straight to Starbucks, followed by Whole Foods, so I could get my organic soy latte and something from WF's gourmet hot bar for lunch.  I'm so blessed that anesthesia doesn't make me sick to my stomach and I can eat right away. :)  Amazing blessing that is!

I'm home recovering well. No major pain. Just a little sore and tired.  I'll be at church on Sunday and back to work on Monday. God is sooooo good!

Thank you for your prayers and well wishes!

Oh, and one other thing -- Bob surprised me this morning with the news that he nominated me and I was chosen as a finalist for an incredible survivor victory challenge contest!!!  I'm one in three finalists!  Will you please consider voting for me (by midnight Monday - winner to be announced on Monday)?  Here's the link:

Please click here to vote for me in the Otterbox Survivor Victory Challenge

Thank you so much - and please, if you're inclined to do so, I'd appreciate you passing the link along.  Our house and morale could use the TLC after two years of focusing our energy and time elsewhere (obviously).

Love and blessings,
Julie

BENIGN!!!

My new favorite word: BENIGN

My surgeon called this evening with the biopsy results: "Julie, I have very good news - it is scar tissue."  That's when I fell to my knees and sobbed tears of joy and praised God aloud over and over. Doc heard me crying and must have thought I misunderstood her as she reiterated that it was good news haha and I told her I was so happy I was crying out of sheer joy. 

With that news out of the way she reminded me that we still need to take it out so it's not left there to turn into something else which apparently can and does happen.  Surgery is still on for Friday morning. Fine by me.

Thank you so much for your prayers and well wishes, making me feel so loved and cared for no matter what the outcome was going to be. God is so good, blessing me with such amazing friends and family.  I'm incredibly grateful.

Remission continues! =) Praise God!  What a relief that the remission clock doesn't need to be reset. 

Like my three year old son, Cooper, has taken to saying lately "that was a close one!"  and "ay ya ya ya ya!" ;)  When he saw me crying while laughing tonight he said "Mommy, you're funny, I love you."  I love you too, Cooper - more than you could ever know!

Dear Lord, my creator and ultimate healer, I praise and thank you for the countless "second chances" you bless me with. My gratitude is immeasurable and my love for you infallible. You brought me back from the brink not just once, but many times and you work through me in ways I never imagined possible. Lord, I ask you to wrap my warrior sisters in your healing light and love - take away their pain and fear and instill a sense of peace and confidence that Your will shall reign for the greater good and that You will provide comfort and healing of all that ails and troubles them.  Lord, I ask you to bring forward the cure for the wretched disease of cancer that plagues us. Show us the way to eliminate the toxins and dangers brought about by greed, selfishness and other evils that Satan thrusts upon us with the false promise of empty "wealth" and "convenience".  Lord, use us survivors to spread your good news and to help our sisters through this difficult trial in their life and show them how they're loved and valued the way I have been loved and valued through my journey. Help us to keep paying it forward, Lord, delivering hope, laughter, and faith in Your name.  In your son, Jesus' name, Amen.